Governance you say?

There has been a lot that’s going on this week which made me question the IQ of people governing us or planning to govern us and wonder what are they snorting in their free time and whether they are willing to share. First up was the raid by Mumbai police on a ‘rave’ party, which is brilliant move I must say. Total respect; take a bow whoever used the complex calculation to reach the decision that the party in question WAS indeed a rave. Pity those people who decided that the best place to organize a rave party will be in the middle of the town AND advertise about it on Facebook too. Unrelated, I have found myself searching for rave word far often after this to see if someone is planning something in my locality.

 I wasn’t even done with showering praises on Mumbai police when our esteemed leaders of opposition decided to take matters in their own hands (no pun intended) and stumbled upon the brilliant idea that not letting anyone work would be a very effective way to bring down petrol prices, which were increased by the evil government to bring down exchange rates (pffffft). So, they declared a bharat bandh, which was voluntarily supported by people who are earning around 80000 per month and get offended by, believe it or not, cartoons. Let me take this opportunity to highlight that as I child I was terribly offended when Dexter made fun of his low-IQ sister. Never the less, since it was a bandh so, people were not allowed to go to work, public transport was stopped and buses were burnt just in case the act wasn’t effective enough. Do you have a better idea to bring down petrol prices? Logic wasn’t our minister’s forte anyway. Last I read petrol prices have actually come down by 2 rs. No, Mamta banerjee hasn’t expressed her happiness yet and all cartoonists who could depict her otherwise have either been locked up, or have abandoned the profession completely. also, Kapil Sibal.

  Govt has such gems working for it/us that some guy actually managed to calculate the total loss incurred to country because of bandh. Yes, an actual figure. I have got to find the person and learn how this is done (In your face, Sheldon cooper!). Some calculation that. I bet Mumbai police is involved here somehow but that is just my gut feeling. Speaking of Mumbai police, now it is mandatory to get a drinking permit before you decide to indulge in your favorite drink in Mumbai. Yes, it is a rule. The card states that you need to consume alcohol ‘due to health reasons’ (I would have pointed out the irony here, but I trust your intelligence). This card should be on you every time, especially if you run into police at a rave party or you should consider shifting base to gurgaon where the number of rules you have to follow is inversely proportional to your monthly salary (not applicable to women after 8). I whole-heartedly recommend a bharat ratna to the person who came up with the idea of issuing license to drink and maintained a straight face while announcing it like a real rule. However, it would have been of tremendous help if they mentioned the agent’s numbers to get it done at the earliest. WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT CAN BE COPIED? There certainly has been no issue with fake passports now is it?

  But I am not complaining about either of the so called problems because a paper down south has hailed Rowdy Rathore, which is a remake of a remake, an outstanding movie and at the time of writing Salman khan has confirmed that bodyguard (produced by reliance) is going to have sequel.

  So all is not bad then is it? Awesome government we have. Hip hip hurray!